Tonight when I was half paying attention to “ER,” I heard the following:
Is she on any meds?
Prednisone and plaquenil*. She has Lupus.
(And of course the woman ended up dying.)
Honestly, if I wanted to watch reality TV, I would. Since when is “ER” considered reality TV?
When they started playing my reality.
I had considered doing either the Lupus or Arthritis walks, but realized that it would be too much, too soon. It would mean that I am accepting the hand I have been dealt.
And eventually, I will have to.
But right now, it is too much, too soon. If “ER” mentioning Lupus makes my skin crawl and my heart beat faster, how would I feel entering myself as one of them?
These wounds are still too fresh and new…
Acceptance takes time.
* What I’ve referred to as Hydroxychloroquine. They are the same thing.