Monday, January 5, 2009

"Why Does Distance Make Us Wise?" A Lesson In Letting Go

I have never really been “into” New Years resolutions, not because I can’t follow through on them, but because I usually decide to change things about myself that are not really amenable to change. But this year, I’m in the mood to make a resolution that I make a concentrated effort at following through on – because I can.

I’m at a crossroads in my life where I can either take a leap of faith or not. It’s like when you’re a kid and you’re hanging from the monkey bars, too afraid to reach for the next bar, and too afraid to let go of the bar and land on the ground. So you’re just… stuck…

So whether its letting go of people in my life who I no longer have the things in common with that held us together, being okay with making choices in my life that others don’t agree with, or letting new people in, I have to follow my own intuition more, listen to others less, and know when my energy is better spent elsewhere and on other things.

That’s where I feel my life is right now. And I think I have a pretty good idea about why I am where I am.

So my resolution is to become better at letting go of things. I’m an over-analyzer; I analyze, re-analyze, and analyze some more. I’m not good at letting go of people or things. It’s a pretty non-discriminating quality.

But I have been thinking a lot about the people that have hurt me lately and the fact that I give them far more energy than they deserve. And I have been evaluating the friendships and relationships in my life that are truly meant to last.

And because there is always a lesson in “Sex and the City,” here is Carrie Bradshaw’s take on letting go:

“Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe you have to let go of who you were, to become who you will be.”

The past is just that – it’s the past. It’s done, it’s over with, and it’s time to move on. And while I know that, that is much easier said than done, I’m at a point in my life where I can no longer afford to ruminate about past slights and hurts, which I have done to others and others have done to me, decisions and indecisions, and all of the other things that are preventing me from moving forward in my life. I need to concentrate on the future. My future. And hopefully 2009 is the beginning of something great!

Wishing everyone a happy and (as) healthy (as possible) 2009. Sorry I’ve been a delinquent blogger these past few weeks. The holidays, getting together with family and friends, a slow Internet connection, and a lot of reading pretty much did me in. But it’s a new year, and I promise to be more consistent with blogging (and my medication schedule)!

1 comment:

  1. Leslie,
    looking forward to watching you shine in 2009...

    sorry, couldn't resist...

    but seriously, I am. ;)