I’m in
sort of a strange place right now.
I had my
last appointment with my rheumatologist in Michigan in August, then I had my
first appointment with my new rheum in November and a follow-up in
January.
As of now,
I don’t have another appointment scheduled.
I am
weaning off of methylprednisolone…finally!
I’ve gone from 8 mg a day, to 6 mg for two weeks, 4 mg for two weeks,
and I’m decreasing to 2 mg at the end of this week. It’s a long process, which will be the
subject of a post sometime in the next few weeks.
I
certainly continue to have aches and pains, and even swelling, especially in my
knees, hips, hands, and wrists.
I don’t
think I’m in remission. I’m on too many
meds, and am not sure where I would be without them. But from this combination of meds, my liver
levels are normal for the first time in eight years. My kidney levels continue to border on abnormal, but hold steady enough to
not be a concern at this point.
I recently
had a rash on the side of my neck and shoulders that turned out to be fungal, a
minor result of an overactive immune system that is being held at bay by meds
that suppress my immune system.
This is
the struggle for those of us who have these kinds of diseases. We have immune systems that mistake our own bodies
for foreign invaders and the only real remedy is to take meds that deplete that
same immune system.
So in
reality, while I might be in an okay place, these illnesses are never far from
my mind…or my heart…
A few
weekends ago, I was commenting on the fact that I’ve been doing pretty well,
and the next day, I could barely get out of bed.
Every time
I get cocky, my illnesses smart me!
I know
that where I’m at right now is probably not likely to be a place I will be
forever. And I hope that when I get to a
difficult place, I am able to cope with it.
Trust me,
I’m not complaining.
But it’s
hard to know what and how to feel about this period of comparative wellness, a
place that I really don’t feel I have ever been in the last seven years.
I definitely
know that I have these illnesses. It’s a
constant game of tug-of-war.
And hopefully
I’m not totally jinxing myself by writing this post.